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 英语翻译 作家格丘山的诗" 梦里的俄罗斯旋律" |
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加人
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加入时间: 2004/02/14
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作者：加人 在 驴鸣镇 发贴, 来自 http://www.hjclub.org
前言
芦笛的英语在我之上，他有特权修改我的翻译
中文诗是给中国人看的。 翻译成英语后，是给美国人看的。
如中文 "一毛不拔" 不能翻译成 "one hair no pull"
只能翻译成 penny-pinching . 非常难忠于原著。
这首诗原来是中文。翻译难免有中文思维。
这首诗是老格写的。 我觉得写的不错。
我只是贪玩，翻译第一段和最后第一段.
首先要翻译成英语，诗词还要押韵。 非常困难！
一边上班一边翻译。 医院突发事件越多。我出错就越多。
★★★★★★★★
当那个忧郁深沉的旋律远远响起的时候
When the gloomy, deep melody was heard from afar,
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
我就见到了俄罗斯一望无际的草原和它的悲伤
I saw Russian endless steppes and her sorrowful heart.
(英语 plain是各种草原,包括中国草原 steppes是俄罗斯特有的草原.
英语诗习惯都说我 而不说你。)
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当班桌琴 单调和无忧无虑的旋律飘来的时候
When the mundane and carefree melody of banjo floated by,
(纺织娘是中国昆虫，美国少，而且是噪音，没旋律。所以我改为
美国特色的班桌琴 Oh! Susanna, do not cry for me;
I come from Alabama, with my Banjo on my knee. 美国流行曲)
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我就见到了美利坚山区和美中平原纯朴的美国农民 以及他们的快乐
I saw The Blue Ridge Mountains and green prairie,
brave cowboys, their joy and pride.
(The Blue Ridge Mountains 蓝岭山脉是美国代表性的山脉，美国第七舰队旗舰就是"蓝岭号" . 美国人人都会的歌曲
John Denver – Country Roads
Almost heaven, West Virginia, Blue ridge mountain, Shenandoah river,
prairie 是美国，北美特有的大草原
著名美国电视剧 草原上的小屋 Little house on the prairie
中国农民种地，蒙古牧民骑马。而美国的农民都骑马。都是牛仔所以我喜欢用牛仔。
中国文化 喜欢说纯朴的农民。而我个人到农村体会，农民并不纯朴。
很多很奸滑, 自私，狭隘，贪婪， 见了加拿大的农民。也没有纯朴的感觉。
而美国崇尚的品德是勇敢。所以我改为 原诗的纯朴为勇敢。
英语诗是给洋人看的。一定要对洋人地口味。所以不断修改原著。
望格兄恕
★★★★★★★★
俄罗斯旋律是我年轻时的梦
Russian melody was the dream in my youth.
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它装满了我在朦胧中对美的向往和对理想的寻求
It possessed all my pursuit of beauty and ideals in my twilight.
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可是围绕着我的却永远是驱之不散的痛苦和悲恸
But I was surrounded by unrelenting sadness and sorrow
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美利坚的旋律是我老年的归宿
American melody is the destination of my old age.
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它让我什么也不再追求
It made me seek no more,
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睡眠在万山千树之中
resting among thousands of mountains and forests
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快乐的歌唱 就像一只小小的秋虫
singing with joy as an autumn beetle.
===============================================
★★★★★★★★
如今我心恰如金阳下起伏的碧波
Now my heart feels like azure waves under the golden sun,
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沐浴在夕阳的光辉下
bathing in the sunset glow
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静静的等着夜幕降临
waiting silently for the night fall come
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但是有时 我心中还会升起俄罗斯的旋律
But from time to time,
Russian melody were still heard faintly in my heart.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
于是我又看到了
茫茫无边的黑黝黝的大草原
Then the boundless dark steppes appeared in my vision again.
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和那总是在远处飘荡的
一丝丝引着我向前探索的火
Oh, the guiding torch to explore my life,
was a forever wandering light far away,
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
啊，那是我已经死去了的年青时的俄罗斯梦
Alas, my romantic Russian dream in my youth had long decayed.
=============================================
翻译格丘山的中文诗 成英语 还要力求押韵
★★★★★★★★
When the gloomy, deep melody was heard from afar,
I saw Russian endless steppes and her sorrowful heart.
When the mundane and carefree melody of banjo floated by,
I saw The Blue Ridge Mountains and green prairie,
brave cowboys, their joy and pride.
★★★★★★★★
Russian melody was the dream in my youth.
It possessed all my pursuit of beauty and ideals in my twilight.
But I was surrounded by unrelenting sadness and sorrow
American melody is the destination of my old age.
It made me seek no more,
resting among thousands of mountains and forests
singing with joy as an autumn beetle.
★★★★★★★★
Now my heart feels like azure waves under the golden sun,
bathing in the sunset glow
waiting silently for the night fall come.
But from time to time,
Russian melody were still heard faintly in my heart.
Then the boundless dark steppes appeared in my vision again.
Oh, the guiding torch to explore my life,
was a forever wandering light far away,
Alas, my romantic Russian dream in my youth had long decayed.
作者：加人 在 驴鸣镇 发贴, 来自 http://www.hjclub.org
上一次由加人于2016-12-13 周二, 下午7:31修改，总共修改了20次 |
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